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ich spreche bisschen deutsch (I speak a little German)
Last month I finished my first deutschkurse with the Humboldt Institute. I feel much better about my ability to understand German in situations outside of checking out at the grocery store or apotheke which is nice. My eaves dropping skills have gained +10. I still freeze up when I need to reply in German but…
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14 year old rage
I have been sitting uncomfortably with my anger. I’m at the point of my healing/processing cycle where I get to revisit this feeling again. As a child I was never truly allowed to express anger, it was an emotion that wasn’t “cheerful obedience” and therefore wrong. It often circles back to me in the autumn.…
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Self Employed? Moving to Germany? Choose 1.
Germany is great. Living in an actual society is great. Not being worried about being bankrupted by a hospital visit is great. Being able to grocery shop or exist in public without fear of being gunned down randomly is fucking amazing. Unfortunately there’s a huge caveat if you are self-employed. You won’t get to live…
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Immigrating is hard
I feel like I’m not allowed to acknowledge or complain or be frustrated about it because I chose to yeet myself across the ocean, but it doesn’t change the fact that sometimes it really sucks. I am in what feels to be a uniquely frustrating situation and I am trying my best to figure it…
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Travelougue 2023
My life has been a whirlwind of travel since June. I’ve been home for three weeks and I feel like I’m just now starting to regain my footing and be fully recovered from the travel-lag. I was in the US for three weeks in June, home for about a week and a half before going…
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I’m a Brompton Boi Now
Fibro has more or less relegated me to my neighborhood because going everywhere on foot or waiting for transit with heavy bags from running errands is incredibly exhausting. Transit is frequent and reliable but not particularly fast, which is fine. The first two make me happy enough, but the last one has made feeling motivated…
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8 weeks off (some) meds
In January I talked about my decision to try going off of my meds. I stopped taking Buspar and Bupropion in February (I’m still taking Ritalin and Gabapentin). I’ve noticed my baseline level of upbeatness is a little lower, mostly replaced by fatigue (thanks, fibro) but otherwise I feel normal. There have been a few…
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The Curse of Living Every Day Like It’s Your Last
In the family I grew up in there were two common, somewhat dissonant but simultaneously applied themes. 1) Don’t live like you belong in the default world because your true home is in Heaven, living on earth is really just a temporary state and 2) live every day like it’s your last and be prepared…
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Freeze Peach
Free speech without boundaries becomes eliminationist speech very quickly, and that’s what we’re seeing.
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Wash, Rinse, Dry, Repeat
Life is a cycle. I keep finding myself surprised and not surprised at the similar feelings I’m having trying to establish myself in a new city country as I had when I was first trying to establish myself as an adult leaving conservative christianity. I didn’t really know how to get a job or find…
© Kieryn Darkwater 2009 – ∞