Yesterday I had an idea – but first, I guess, the back story.
I, like every other woman, struggle with self image, self confidence, self esteem – basically, anything that has to do with thinking I am in any way good or valuable, I struggle with, and I always have. Because I don’t feel like I am, or like I’m worth allowing myself to be and feel the way I dream. Although we all know deep in the recesses of our souls, the little girls we keep in corners of our hearts are telling us that we actually are worth believing the best about ourselves, we don’t listen, because we look in the mirror everyday. We step on the scale, we see our stomachs aren’t where we’d like them to be, we’re out of shape, we have lip hair (hate. that. so. much.) or hair in weird places (toes, anyone? or is that just me?) we know we could be fit, and we want to be, so we work really really hard to get there, and look in the mirror and still see all the flaws and determine that I’m just not beautiful, and nothing is working.
Yesterday, I was having a particularly gloomy episode. Bad lighting and a bad face day, and not being where I wanted to be on the scale just all sort of meshed with my general tiredness and wasn’t helping anything much. In the evening I was redesigning the header here, and lurking around pinterest, and I’d spent a few hours writing, and was generally locked up inside my head when a bit of inspiration hit from future self. Future Self, who’s lovely, beautiful, and good at making people feel better. So, I grabbed red and black dry erase markers and wrote the note from this Future Self, and this is what it said.
Hey! You! Sexy! Yeah, you. I just wanted to say that YOU are beautiful. I know, I know, you feel fat and like nothing you’re doing is helping but listen to this: YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL RIGHT NOW exactly the way you are. When you finally see yourself that way, everything you’re doing will seem much better because regardless, you know you ARE beautiful. Love, your future self
It’s on Pinterest too.
I’m hoping that if it’s there on the mirror that I look in everyday, at eye level, eventually I’ll read it and internalize it enough that I’ll actually be able to remember those truths and that, I think, will make all the difference.