1) get dressed in day clothes that make you feel good, even if it’s just for a little while. 2) work out for 5 minutes to get your blood moving and to notice your body and feel it. 3) brush your hair if you don’t like how it feels or looks. put the dragonfly clips
Sometimes I don’t want to talk about depression because I don’t want it to depress other people or cause them to worry about me. But sometimes the only thing that really helps is to talk about it… So, TW: depression, I guess.
We’re sort of slowly getting ready to move across the country in the spring, and so I’ve been trying to get rid of things – extra clothes, furniture, etc, that I’m not using/don’t need…nothing weird (except for maybe having been planning this move all year). I’ve been thinking about how nice it feels to have
I’ve been triggering myself a little lately, getting introspective about life and the meaning. Nothing weird I guess, but in my dreams I found myself missing things I don’t actually miss, missing rituals and set answers – things I consciously don’t actually value. I’m not particularly sentimental, and I don’t really care about tradition for
I’ve been taking the full-dose of Zoloft (currently 50mg a day) for about a week now. I was going strong until I got stressed out on Friday, and then everything just kinda has been a haze of anxiety. I was super focused and creative and fucking fantastic for a week…excusing the bouts of nausea/dizziness and
1) Meh, this is probably not anything. I can deal with it, everyone else is probably the same way. 2) I deserve this, I shouldn’t fix it, it’s just part of me and most likely my fault (thanks bad theology for roping yourself into the worst places) 3) That’s bullshit, no one deserves to live
I crashed for two hours and I feel a little better about things. I’ve been dealing with a lot of self loathing and emotional exhaustion and anxiety and just feeling like I’m the most horrible person ever to walk the earth (which is ridiculous if I think about it, because I don’t actively TRY to
It’s worth mentioning, in 2010, my parents all but disowned me and I spent 2 weeks crying, in my room, with the lights out, dealing with an amount of intense pain that I had only dealt with once before – in 2008 when my parents told me that I couldn’t see or talk to my
Looking back, it’s no wonder that all of the feelings and self loathing that lead to my depression, brought depression. I was taught that I was worthless, that I should never think well of myself, that I needed to be humble, I was never allowed to show any emotion that was not a plastic smile.
I’m going to be doing a series of posts about depression (my depression). I could do one long post but it’d be a small book… I’ve struggled with depression since puberty. That’s about as far back as I remember anyway. At the time, I had no words for what I was feeling/going through, my parents