Category: Something Real

  • ich spreche bisschen deutsch (I speak a little German)

    ich spreche bisschen deutsch (I speak a little German)

    Last month I finished my first deutschkurse with the Humboldt Institute. I feel much better about my ability to understand German in situations outside of checking out at the grocery store or apotheke which is nice. My eaves dropping skills have gained +10. I still freeze up when I need to reply in German but…

  • 14 year old rage

    14 year old rage

    I have been sitting uncomfortably with my anger. I’m at the point of my healing/processing cycle where I get to revisit this feeling again. As a child I was never truly allowed to express anger, it was an emotion that wasn’t “cheerful obedience” and therefore wrong. It often circles back to me in the autumn.…

  • Immigrating is hard

    Immigrating is hard

    I feel like I’m not allowed to acknowledge or complain or be frustrated about it because I chose to yeet myself across the ocean, but it doesn’t change the fact that sometimes it really sucks. I am in what feels to be a uniquely frustrating situation and I am trying my best to figure it…

  • Travelougue 2023

    Travelougue 2023

    My life has been a whirlwind of travel since June. I’ve been home for three weeks and I feel like I’m just now starting to regain my footing and be fully recovered from the travel-lag. I was in the US for three weeks in June, home for about a week and a half before going…

  • Freeze Peach

    Freeze Peach

    Free speech without boundaries becomes eliminationist speech very quickly, and that’s what we’re seeing.

  • Wash, Rinse, Dry, Repeat

    Wash, Rinse, Dry, Repeat

    Life is a cycle. I keep finding myself surprised and not surprised at the similar feelings I’m having trying to establish myself in a new city country as I had when I was first trying to establish myself as an adult leaving conservative christianity. I didn’t really know how to get a job or find…

  • Wants Are Good Too

    Wants Are Good Too

    I am actively choosing to prioritize myself and my health. Not just in the not-dying sense, but in the this-would-make-my-daily-life-easier sense. I’ve been working on this for years and progress is slow. It’s hard. There’s a voice in my head that’s extremely loud that tells me “you don’t really need that” anytime I think about…

  • Nature (Trauma) is Healing

    Nature (Trauma) is Healing

    I’ve been experiencing a lot of headaches trying to do basic things like get my brain meds filled in Germany. There are rules like only certain types of general doctors can prescribe anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medications, only certain kinds of doctors can prescribe testosterone, and of course only psychiatrists can prescribe ADHD meds. On top…

  • It happened to me (2022)

    It happened to me (2022)

    Well the last half of this month didn’t go as I hoped. I got COVID and have spent the last two weeks recovering. It’s frustrating because I have been careful this whole time, but my personal mitigations mean less and less as fewer people are taking it seriously. I’ve been struggling to find a balance…

  • Digital Displacement

    Digital Displacement

    I joined twitter in December of 2006. I’ve found good friends and partners there (when people ask what dating app I use, my answer is always “twitter”), I’ve gone viral, I’ve built a reputation for myself. When I write about christofascism or homeschooling or parental-rights extremism there people listen and share. It has been a…