Tag things

2 posts

General Stuffs

Thanksgiving was a thing that happened. I’m still recovering.
Our apartment flooded on Wednesday, so we’ve had to re-arrange until, hopefully, our roof actually gets fixed.
Our computers are currently in the kitchen, because it doesn’t rain there.
My body is trying to find equilibrium with the progestin, and it’s making me kind of moody – well, that and the weather, because sinuses.
I’m grumpy because my setup is all messed up and my workspace is cluttered because two computers and all the wires and I feel like I can’t draw. I don’t have enough visual space to draw and it’s frustrating.
I can’t decide if I feel christmasy, and like decorating, or if I hate it’s guts because every night from 5-9 on the half-hour the LL Bean tree has a loud lightshow that I can feel the bass of.
A lot of very small things are stressing me out at unreasonable levels and I know I just need to wait it out, and meditate, and cry, but it’s frustrating. I hate feeling like I’m going to have a meltdown because I don’t have enough room to use my tablet, but, reasons.
In other news, making progress with Ni No Kuni. I stop after I die and take time to re-think my strategy. I’m working on the boss in the golden forest, I think he may be immune to fire, so I should try frost. I should try more slicing and less sand too, maybe less pebble throwing.

Ignition

The things that ignite my soul are the things that I try to {re}create and do. Sometimes I get overwhelmed because I try to do everything and learn ALL the things, and sometimes I have to remind myself that I can do things and that I have goals and plans and ambitions and reasons.
I read this article about the other side of vulnerability.
I went back through the archives and realized, I’ve written quite a bit about it, sort of. I’ve written a lot of my goals, progressambitions, some catalysts, and the things I need most – the things my soul craves.
I haven’t revisited them much, lately. I’ve been preoccupied with the real-life aspect. Getting ready for KieryGeek, getting websites up and running, working away mentally at things that I love but not really giving myself a chance to revel in it.
Guilt sets in sometimes because I feel like I’m leeching off my husband (even though I’m not) and I feel like I’m inadvertently perpetuating the stereotype of 50’s housewife that I was raised to embody; the thing I keep finding myself fighting and crying against with all of me.
I know that I’m not that, I know that I’m more than that, I’m doing things; I know that I’m not a stereotype and I don’t fit in boxes, and I love that.