Tag cold

2 posts

more misc

It’s snowing, I’m in a sweater, leggings, fluffy socks, and a warm blanket and I’m still cold. I braved the weather to get food.
WP_20141102_002
I started a fairy porn tumblr and theoretically increased the amount of comics I draw per week.
I had a lot of unexpected social but ended up getting rid of the PVC pipe from our greenscreen project/holder thing, finally. Apparently people LOVE free PVC pipe.
I moved the xbox back into my office and realized it hates me trying to play multiplayer ME3 in a party, but it’s still great for watching Futurama.
I was a lot of up and down this week, but that was okay. I also did a LOT of little things – taking things to the thrift store, recycling, etc…
Playing more minecraft and streamed some of it. I even figured out how to breed chickens and pigs.
2014-10-31_22.46.14
I’m waiting anxiously until I can schedule my last HPV shot at planned parenthood, and then I will be IMMUNE. I will also go to the DMV and renew my license and take a new picture where I don’t look like a homeschooler who has no idea what to do with their hair.
Need to remember to vote on Tuesday.
I realized, now that I’m actually old enough to vote myself, get-out-the-vote campaigns don’t matter as much to me as they used to, which I think is weird, but I guess it’s because I know I’m going to vote, and as long as I can vote I’m not concerned about getting other people to vote on my behalf.
I also got some rum and whiskey on Halloween (and also I got candy because I wore my fox costume to run errands over lunch and it was awesome), which means I’ll have something to help me watch the election results.
Mostly I’m writing this boring ramblyness to keep myself awake, but I’m hitting publish, so it only realllly worked for like 15 minutes 😛

Permission to rest

I’ve been sick with a cold-like-thing for almost two weeks, the symptoms themselves aren’t horrid, it’s just that I have no energy and end up completely exhausted after doing one thing that involves moving around.
Last week I had a physical and a pap smear which was exciting. Good news is: my BMI is good and my physical went smashingly, I got to talk to someone about my hormonal issues and I was prescribed a low dose of antidepressants (which is good! progress!). Bad news: I still have a cold, pap smear was painful, and antidepressants make me dizzy.
I’ve been subconsciously stressed which doesn’t help. What happens is, when I’m sick I feel bad for two reasons: one, I’m sick, and secondly, because I don’t have enough energy or the ability to live up to the expectations I have of myself, or the plans that I have.
I can barely wash dishes right now without exhausting myself, but I feel guilty because I haven’t been able to meet with people I generally meet with, or do things I generally do, or function at as high a capacity as I want to.
I feel bad because it’s been so long and I still have no energy and feel bad and it happened right after I had already felt bad due to hormones, so I feel like I haven’t been able to do much of anything for about a month, which sends me back into the guilt spiral which makes me feel worse psychologically and physically (and the two are so closely related in my body, it’s not even funny).
I really want to do things, and go places, and I’m so tired of not feeling well and not being able to, but that’s not changing unless I can rest and not subconsciously stress about it.
So, I really appreciate everyone’s patience with me (and mostly, my patience to myself – but I’m so relieved when I realize I’m not letting anyone down, because I don’t want to let people down. unless I am, if I am, I’m SO SORRY! o.O) – I’m trying to get better but I think in that I’m making it worse. I’m already starting to stress about the next KieryGeek episode because it primarily depends on whether or not I can get to Salem this weekend and I need to stop.
I need to just give myself a break and not make myself feel obligated to do things, even though I badly badly want to.