Category: Courtship

  • I Kissed Dating Goodbye, Said Hello to Courtship, Met a Boy, and Got Married

    My parents said they wanted to talk to me one day. I was like 8 or 10 or something innocuous and the thought of boys and kissing was still gross (ew, spit). They said that they decided I wouldn’t be allowed to date, that I would court instead. I said okay, having no idea what […]

  • An Open Letter to Hillary from Quivering Daughters

    Dear Hillary, I don’t even know where to begin. You’ve grown and lived and thrived and your life journey is a beautiful work of art, it almost feels wrong to bring up Quivering Daughters even just to say thank you. But I’m not speaking just for me, when I say, sincerely, thank you for writing […]

  • First.

    I graduated high school three years before my friends did. I was getting married at the same time they were getting their diplomas. I felt the eyes of all the parents and their kids on me as I navigated the hell that was my courtship – even the families with kids in their 20’s hadn’t […]

  • Well Then, God is a Shitty Author Part 5

    And then we ran away and lived happily ever after, right?! Well….After I got up to Maine my parents began this routine where they were suddenly super nice! Sent me my clothes, told me I could come back…and then would also be really mean. Back and forth, back and forth. I had just escaped an […]

  • Well Then, God is a Shitty Author Part 4

    I went a couple weeks listening to my parents and not talking to Alex. Making sure they weren’t monitoring me, etc. As they became convinced I had moved on (apparently cutting my hair in an effort to defy them = moving on) I went into planning mode. Alex and I had figured out ways of […]

  • Well Then, God is a Shitty Author Part 3

    Spring Break was tense, and tension just kept rising. In May, something broke. I cannot remember what it was in specific. As much as I’ve tried to block off most of these memories, that one was just….I can’t get to it. I know it happened, I know I felt betrayed by my parents in a way I’d […]

  • Well Then, God is a Shitty Author Part 2

    Alex’s dad called mine because he wanted Alex not to be crushed if he asked and dad said no. Or so the story goes. Anyway, not long after, maybe the next day or later that night, Alex called and asked dad The Question (because asking to court is basically asking to marry me. I’m not […]

  • Well Then, God is a Shitty Author

    cracks knucklesSo, I was looking in the archives and realized that in the ~5 years I’ve been blogging here, I’ve only mentioned courting like, 4 times (swear it feels like more though), and it’s such a huge part of my story….but also an intensely emotional and painful one, which is why it’s referenced but never […]

  • Child Marriage: I dodged the bullet

    I don’t know that I’ve written much about the process of the relationship Alex and I had before we got married. I started this blog after the fact and before I had even begun to process the hellmouth that was my childhood.With three creepy-as-fuck-patriarchs coming out in favor of child marriage – something they’d always […]

  • On being a broom (and why I can’t just relax and enjoy shit)

    I realized why I have a hard time relaxing and taking actual vacations and even enjoying the holidays. As a child all of the times that most children have “off” to play and relax and do their own thing, I never had. We never had summer break, we took Nov-Jan off every year instead, and […]