Midday Muse

Sometimes I learn slower than I’d like. I get frustrated because PHP isn’t intuitive and I can watch a segment and then I have to take a break and let what I learned sit there for a couple days before going back for more. On the upside, I am actually grasping it this time, but I wish I knew all the things now so I could make stuff already.
But I guess no one really learns a language in a day, and I am making progress, so that’s good.
Unrelated to PHP Basics though, I am exhausted and heavy hearted. Part of me doesn’t know why, and part of me is aware that I’m just sensing the weight of the world. I’m doing the best I can to make a small piece of it better though, and I just have to keep plugging away. I can’t focus on everything, and that’s okay.

Belonging

What does it mean to belong? I’m a part of many groups but always try not to feel attached, in case something goes wrong and they don’t want me anymore (thanks, parents). Being actively involved in belonging scares me because it feels like a huge commitment I don’t know if I want to make.  Which

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