My art journal and painting themes are quickly becoming permission slips for myself. Focusing on granting my heart the thing it needs at that moment and somehow silencing my very loud, harsh, inner critic.
She’s a bitch and always tells me what to do, doesn’t let me sleep when I need to and is generally just cruel. She comes out the most when I need a break, and makes me feel bad about not doing things immediately and has no patience. She claims the world will end if those chores aren’t done right now and berates me when I wait and condescendingly tells me “If you had done it earlier, you wouldn’t have to do it now while you’re trying to do this other thing.”
Or, her other favorite:
“You’re really stupid and worthless, you should have been doing something constructive instead. Something to make money instead of doing all this useless crap. You’re not even good at anything anyway”
Somedays, she holds me hostage and I can’t bring myself to do anything (literally).
After wrestling all day with Miss Monday, I realized that art would be the one thing to make her go away. While it’s text and words, is the permission I needed to see and Miss Monday decided to start backing off. Finally.
Actually, I’m neither of those things, anymore. I generally try my best not to be rude, but after two attempts, I feel confident in calling myself (finally) ginger!
I dyed my hair a few days ago, using Revlon’s bright auburn but it didn’t really stick. I’ve had the hardest time finding a red that came with a bleaching kit. The only one I’ve found locally is Splat, which I love, but I’m not really going for fire-engine red (as truly epic as it is). So I picked up a Garnier “brownish-red” dye kit at Target (yay for no bad smells that give me headaches for two days like the last one!) and left that in my hair for an hour, reapplying at will.
The picture quality is really bad, but the red actually stuck and looks really good. My hair was successfully lightened up a few shades too and has a pleasantly fruity smell. Not quite as nice as my blue dye, but significantly nicer than the last round.
Looks like season two of KieryGeek is going to feature a ginger after all! ^.^