Changing the World

I used to fantasize about either taking over the world, or just changing the world in high school.

I’m good at politics and basically lived and breathed that world for 4 years. My politics have changed significantly since then, but sometimes a moment comes along and that bit of me that I’ve left in the past where I thought it belonged, sparks.

I realize more and more that I have many “faces” but not so much faces, as facets. I get energy and exhilaration from many things, and maybe there’s a way to embrace all of those passions, and not focus solely on one at the expense of another, or cut one huge part of myself off completely just to avoid it.

Maybe I can blend my love of the arts with that thing that ignites when I’m culturally aware and just want to do something. It’s all I’ve ever wanted really, and it’s been staring me in the face. All I want to be able to do is something, to change something, to have a reason to be remembered because I tried to make something better.

It makes me feel so vulnerable. I’ve been looking for something new but it’s been there all along, just different than what I thought it was initially.

I want to make a mark on the world, and I want to make it better. I feel alive when I make things and do things that I feel matter. I love art because with it I can express thoughts and emotions that I can’t put into words.

I don’t want to make propaganda pieces or anything, that’s sort of….my definition of what my art shouldn’t become – and whenever I’ve tried it always turns out much too preachy for my taste. I prefer to center around universal truths that seeking souls sort of…find and cling to, or mine does anyway. But art is powerful, and I’m good at that too.

Artivist? maybe… Rise of a Beautiful Champion? perhaps (sounds like a weird movie title). Maybe I’m an idealist…but maybe in some way, I could change a small part of the world.

Starting with mine {and learning what that means}. Maybe having a vastly huge and possibly unattainable dream with so much room to explore isn’t a bad thing, because small ones just aren’t working for me.

I have a voice…I’m just learning what it sounds like.

Strangely, the epiphany occurred while reading this article from Esquire.

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