Aspire

You know the feeling you get when there’s something brewing and you just have no idea what it is or how to channel it? You end up just feeling restless and there are so many things you’re thinking about and it’s all just building up inside you until it overflows into _something_ that you can hopefully do something with. Full of aspiration and questions and hope and exhaustion (’cause it’s tiring) all at the same time. So many things you could do, so many things you want to do, and yet, you don’t have a clue how to put them together.

I sew (though, it hasn’t taken off yet), I write (I was written about and published several articles), I speak (well, I’ve spoken as a keynote once.), I draw, I paint, I design, I coordinate (events – did a military rally once, that was fun, and a ton of campaigning), I strategize (good phone banking scripts are actually possible to make if you know the people), I dance, I act, I brainstorm.

I can do so many things, and there are so many things I’d like to do, I feel like I’m full of aspiration and potential, but I have no idea how or where to channel it. Then deciding what’s fantasy and what’s feasible. It’d be a dream to move to California, but to do that we’d be leaving our family (which we kind of do enjoy seeing regularly) and then are we really ready for that? To make the jump? To start working on dreams? To make our aspiration something tangible? I don’t know.

Life is good. I like being able to be here, at this crossroads or whatever you want to call it. Where we can choose and go and move and live freely, even though I’m not really sure what that is yet.

In the mean time, I’ve taken inspiration (from Alice in Wonderland) and made some new scarves you should look up.

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One comment

  1. I know this feeling well. Once it seems the whole world (not the “worldly” sense of the word) is opened up to you, it feels like a child trying to choose among 50 flavors of ice cream. 🙂 Enjoy this in-between; I know that sometimes I rushed through it, anxious to get to the other side and figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up. 🙂 Let yourself enjoy experiences, life with your husband, and keep seeking the Lord’s will. Your path will unfold before you. <3 Hugs!

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